Edie Sedgwick died of a drug overdose at the tender age of 28, she was a youthquake. And here I am, I want to live as long as I can. I think the world is turning upside down. It's great.
She was sick, so they put make up on her and she looked beautiful again. I want to wear zero makeup and be seen in the same beauty-light. This is how the world can be and is in some ways.
She used to take off her clothes in public and get photos and it was risqué and turned heads and caught attention and press and media and she became famous. Her childhood was torn and tortured. Drugs and alcahol. Like Kurt Cobain. Andy Warhol was devoured and eaten alive by the terms of queer and faggot. But what about now, what about today. You don't see that. I don't just hear things anymore like "everyone is really the same... we're all just, humans" - I know that already, I always have. It's true. It's always been true. So keep your skin to yourself if you want to, I will, and have something special and sacred and personal and sensual to share with my love. And with the other things I truely care for like my body and my mind and my family, yes I'll watch out for them too. This is a generation of caring but not obsessing, when it used to be to not care but secretly obsess until your heart was devoured and your mind was full of holes and no amount of smokey cigarettes could make you look any cooler so death was the only way out. And okay sure they say we all die anyways but i'd like to live it out conciously, my life that is, and be aware of what i'm doing. Autopilot is for day dreaming and meditation and feeling floaty on a runner's high and listening to your favorite new ooh la la song and dancing about in your semi-charmed life and letting yourself be happy. What is happy you say? It's smiling, you know, feeling good for no good reason. You're allowed you know. So start over, right now, and baby steps, and fruit, and water, and baths, and books. And movies and travelling, and sleeping, and going outside. Yeah, you can feel as good as Edie looks, and then it will just glow through your skin, no matter what age you are. How great is that. How liberating is that. It's like, riding a bike down hill without a helmet on and knowing you'll be okay. And then, actually being okay. And then eating a banana and watching something hilarious on tv or YouTube. Yeah, I think I like that idea. The one where everything is okay, because I want it to be.
ps. Yes, I am watching Factory Girl on Netflix. The NYLON Articles make so much more sense now! xxx
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